Ok, we have already established the importance of using the right tone of voice when communcating so now lets talk about how to effectively express your feelings. When you find yourself at an impass with your partner and neither one of you are hearing the other, not just listening but hearing each other, try this exercise.
Set the timer on your phone for 5 minutes. I suggest you start with a short amount of time or you may risk losing the attention of your partner and you may find yourself back where you started. Each of you get out a note pad and pen. Each of you will take a turn expressing your feelings while the other person take notes. You are not to interupt the person who has the floor.
After the five minutes are up, switch positions. Take turns reading aloud the words you wrote while your partner was speaking. Take a moment to digest and take in what was said. Discuss the outcome of the exercise with each other. You can do this as often as you need to. This excerise will bring the energy level to a better place of understanding. At the very least it will diffuse some of the anger and frustration that you both may be feeling at the time. The main objective is to allow you both to shift the energy and approach any situation in a calm fashion.
Best Wishes and Happy Communicating